Sunday, May 27, 2012

a break.

the truth is, Lord, i miss him a lot and i'm too overwhelmed by their presence.

the fact is, Lord, we need a break from each other. 

the sad thing is, Lord, he needs it more than i do. they do not realize i need one too.

the obvious is, Lord, i'm scared of losing him. and them.

but the solution is, Lord, i'll wait even if it hurts. i'll make through it.

others may see that i'm a fool for waiting, a fool for not giving up, a fool for not thinking about myself first. I'm sorry. others may see i don't appreciate them, i get angry easily, i just want to have my way. I'm sorry.

the truth is i'm weak. i can't stand the pain. the truth is i still remember what happened in the past. i want to let it go, yet i fail. i want all of it to be gone, yet i remember. the truth is, i need a break from all of these. i need to be myself.

it's enough. enough is enough.

there's a time in life where one needs to be alone and seek a new purpose.a new beginning.a new goal.a new ambition.

i know it's now because i never felt so alone, so weak, so in need of God. not because i don't feel the same way before. not because of my relationship with ray. not because i'm scared to death of my results. not because nobody is around me. but it's because the feelings are stronger than ever. stronger that i could have ever felt in my life. the strongest so far. the time is now. the time is now.

MY TIME IS NOW.

Kini tibalah masanya untuk aku meninggalkan duniawi dan kembali kepada Allah Tuhanku; dan tenang di dalam cinta kasihNya.

Lord, bless my journey to You. Amen.



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